the journey of a butterfly

khaliah's journey with sjs/ten

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The Butterfly Blog

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2am Thoughts

By Khaliah, Apr 8 2014 02:14AM

4/1/14


On another sleepless, 2 am night, I’m stuck wondering why I went through this whole ordeal. What am I supposed to learn from this? I believe that everything happens for a reason and that we are to learn some valuable life lesson through every good or bad thing that we experience. A lot of people comment on my strength through this process…but to me, I’ve felt pretty weak at times. There were weeks that I couldn’t look in a mirror without bursting into tears. I felt ugly and damaged. And for the life of me, I could not figure out why God would allow this to happen to me! Romans 8:28 says that the Lord causes everything to work together for the GOOD of those who love him…and yet this situation is BAD! This might possibly be the worse thing that has ever happened to me. But then strangely, it’s turning out to be the biggest time of growth and I’m learning so much about myself. I’m realizing I’m a lot stronger than I have given myself credit for. But my strength is God-given. And I know that because there have many multiple times throughout this ordeal that I just wanted to give up and quit. But something in me would not let myself stay down for too long. Something in me always looks to find the bright side of everything I encounter. And that can only be explained as- Jesus. Even when I feel faithless, He continues to bless me. And EVERY bad thing that has happened to me thus far in my life, something good has come out of it. Whether that was a person I met or a lesson that I learned, God has used it to bless me! So I HAVE to believe that He will use this. I mean, He spared me, so that must mean I’m here for some reason, right?

1 comments
Apr 9 2014 01:10PM by Angela Desselle

I have been following my nieces story since I got the news. I often wonder and ask God why is it a tragedy or something terrible that happens that is the reason for a family to be reunited? I still dont have the answer but I must say Im glad to be in contact with this awesome amazing older version of my daughter London lol. Im excited about what God is doing in her life and the story thats being written. Khaliah you are beautiful inside and out and Im so proud of you for not giving up on God and not giving up on yourself. I love you so much.

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